Top Ten Reasons Why Dad is the Best!

June 19, 2015  - by 

1. When faced with the problem of algae at the bottom of the pool, tennis shoes with sandpaper taped to the bottom was the “obvious answer”.

2. Has proved successful in naming all 5 of his children in the order which they were born, when spotted the first.

3. Humbly stood back and watched as others were given credit for the following list of items he believes to have invented: mini-kite, hunk-a-bread, mousetrap with spear & paper.

4. Most common place dad likes to experiment with social norms: elevator.

5. Most commonly used phrase uttered by dad when taking someone on a tour of the very full garage: “I’ve finally got it just the way I want it.”

6. Self-employed, dad was concerned one day that he may have inadvertently been embezzling from himself for several years.

7. With his children ignoring their Saturday chores, dad unleashed, arguably, the least successful punishment of all time when he declared “you’ve lost the privilege to work.” This would also mark the last punishment he was asked to hand out.

8. Items that dad collects: typewriters, coins, motorbikes, cap guns, lawnmower parts, rubber bands, printing presses. Estimated total value: $74.

9.  Although fully functional, dad claimed the REWIND button on the VCR was purely cosmetic and didn’t think “it’s meant to do that.”

10. For being an extraordinarily entertaining and loving dad.

Happy Father’s Day!

 

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